Monday, September 29, 2008

Hello, My Name is Samantha. . .

Well. . . my bar name is anyway.

The only times I actually use it are when a complete weirdo/old weird guy/creepy guy comes up to me and asks my name or when a completely and utterly drunk guy comes up and asks. Saturday night the latter happened.

Now the reason I use the fake name for the completely drunk guy is because one of two things could happen:

1) He somehow will remember my name and yell it at me across the bar/street/parking lot, or

2) If around microphone equipment, he will somehow remember my name and say it on the microphone and make me come up and karaoke and then keep saying it until I actually come up. (Sorry, repressed memory. . .)


So on Saturday night at Oktoberfest this super drunk guy comes up to my group of friends and says "Hey come up and dance with us!" Then starts talking to us and asks the ladies in the group their names. Well I'm the last one, and I say "Samantha" at which point, my friend Laura spits out her beer and rolls over laughing uncontrollably. She apparently had never heard me say this before. The guy, who was an attractive looking guy mind you but extremely drunk, looks at her and says, "I know. . . I'm druuunnnk. . . but I just don't want this awesome polka music to go to waste!" He continued to get us to try and dance but to no avail. I wasn't drunk enough yet, and there were 2 people dancing and one guy I was really surprised could even stand. He was doing more of a walking-kick dance. I think to obtain balance. However, after giving the fake name Chops decided that he would call me Samantha the entire rest of the night. And we figured Laura's bar name should be Tess. Well as we were walking around drunk guy actually apologized for trying to get us to dance. His friends were in the band and apparently they had recruited him and some others to get people to dance. It thought that was nice on his part. Now I'm kind of wishing I wouldn't have given him the fake name! ;)

As we are leaving Oktoberfest just Laura and I, this group of 4 guys and 1 girl comes up and 2nd drunk dancing guy comes and puts his arm around me. Again, I think for support. He asks our names and of course I say "Samantha" and Laura says "Tess." He then also asks if one of us would like to make out with him later. To which I say, "Oh darn, I would, but I don't even know your name." So then I ask his name and he says "Peter." I ask him if I can call him Pete because I really like that better and Peter just sounds dirty. He says no. And I say "Didn't you watch the show Pete and Pete?" And he said "Yes but I don't have a dancing tattoo, so I can't just call myself that." He is now approximately a block behind his friends to which the girl in the group yells back "Ted, Hurry up!!" Drunk guy gave me his bar name! haha! What are the odds?!? And I'm guessing he used Peter because he indeed was wanting to be dirty. So I started giving him crap about giving me a fake name. And he tries telling me that his real name is Peter, blah, blah, blah. Well we leave him and go to the bars.

I then proceed to get drunk. I'm not sure how this happened. I was normal, normal, then drunk. Out of nowhere. Well Wine Rep was bartending and wanted me to come see him, which I did want to do but when I texted him and asked if I came there if he would take me home since I didn't have a vehicle, he never texted back. Now if he's wanting to get out of the "Friend" zone he's needing to do these things. So after the third bar we went to, I'm standing at the bar and who should walk by?? Peter/Ted. So I yell "Hey Ted!" and of course he turns to look and I say "Ted, Ted, Ted. . .it's not nice to give people fake names" and then walk away shaking my head.

Then as I was also standing at the bar, this really drunk guy doing this swaying stance asks to buy me a beer and if I could tell him what he was drinking. To which his friend informs me it's his bachelor party. So I smell his drink and he was drinking Red Bull and Vodka. He thanked me and then proceeded to put his hand on my arse. And as I moved his hand off of me, he apologized, and then I told him he needs to be drinking water. His friend agreed but made him finish the drink first. Apparently the guy was a founding member of the band Slipknot. Yeah, can't remember his name. And the other guy was some famous drummer. No idea whatsoever what their names were. But the guy on the other side of me knew who they were.

So as I proceed to get drunker, I texted Dean to see if he was out and about and would come and pick me* up. And you know what?? He was almost asleep and in bed. But he came the 20 minutes to get me, drove me the 20-25 minutes home, and then drove to his house the 20 minutes. Now that's a friend. And since I was drunk I think I talked non-stop from the very moment of getting into his vehicle. I now probably owe him. But I think since he broke my heart, he owes me these kind of things, right??


*I don't mind taking cabs. . . but as a girl, I really don't like taking them late at night to my house. I have in Chicago numerous times, but it's a little different. This town is a lot smaller and easier to remember where you dropped someone off at 2am.

2 comments:

Sarah said...

Were you at actual Oktoberfest or were you at an Oktoberfest party? I promise this is relevant. I have a friend who had a big Oktoberfest party, and it would be really crazy if you were there.

Idea #527 said...

It was an actual Oktoberfest celebration here.

And it was in Iowa.