Thursday, August 28, 2008

Dear Tim Tebow

I hate to be writing this letter to you, but I just can't help myself. It's not because I had a hard time not cheering for Michigan in a Bowl Game because of your good looks. (I was actually sitting next to this guy--maybe even laying on--who I really wanted to date too, and it was awkward because I usually had bad thoughts about him, but then I saw you and started having those bad thoughts about you.) I also realize that was the only time I think I EVER cheered for Michigan. I mucking Hate Fichigan. Words can't describe how much I loathe them. But I digress. Back to you.

You not only are good looking, but you also were one or maybe one of few underclassmen to ever win the Heisman Trophy. The only other Heisman Trophy winner I had a crush on was Matt what's his name. I can't even say it now because I vowed after he dated Paris Hilton, that he would be stricken from my mind. Don't date Paris Hilton. Please.

I realize you're only 21, but there just seems to be something about you. I then decided to see if you were on Wikipedia. And you are. Did you know you have quite a large entry as well. That's what she said. And then I slightly fell in love with you a little more. You're were home schooled. Your parents were missionaries. You're a Pastor's Kid. I imagine you have a wild side since you were a pastor's kid and as with most pastor's kids I know, they are isn't a wild child. But for now, I'll just find you to just be a very upstanding collegiate athlete who doesn't go out with any skanky women and is saving yourself for marriage. I mean, there are probably jersey chasers throwing themselves all over you. But it's great that you refrain from any of that. Kudos. Kudos.

My cousin brought up the fact that I might be a jersey chaser. But let me tell you, I just like guys who play sports. And I LOVE watching guys play sports. Not professional sports as much. I love watching collegiate sports. Or recreational sports. Guys just having fun playing sports. I don't know why I like it so much. You fit that category. And you play sports very well. I haven't seen you play kickball, sand volleyball, or softball which would ultimately help me figure out if we're destined for each other.

Maybe we'll meet when I'm stuck at the airport or something. I would like that. Get a hold of me and I can let you know when I'll be there.

Love Always,

The new Love of your Life

1 comment:

pj said...

As usual when you write about somebody "famous", I have no idea who in hell you are talking about. So I googled the love of your life. Looks like he's a boob man.