Happy Birthday to me. . . Happy Birthday to me???

It's funny as someone gets older they seem to handle birthdays differently.

Some handle them with a grain of salt (and a lime. . . and tequila. . .)

Others go into this downward spiral of depression on their upcoming birthday.

I think I am in between. I'm not looking forward to this birthday. It's not quite my 30th. . . but it is my 29th. One year until that dreaded 30.

I think when I look back at my life, I really thought it would be different than it is now. But maybe it's right where it's supposed to be. I don't know.

When I was a senior in college and turned 22, I thought, man, when I'm 30, I'll be a doctor, married, maybe have a kid on the way. . .

In case you were keeping track, none of that has happened.

I can explain not being a doctor. I made that choice. Maybe I had a different calling or something. I do still occasionally "play" a doctor. And then my grandfather reminds me that if I had actually become a doctor he would listen to me more and it would save him trips to his own doctor who subsequently tells him the exact same thing I did.

On being married. . . it's not like I don't want to get married. I do. And at one time, I thought I saw myself marrying someone. But in reality, when it came down to it, maybe he wasn't the one. I've quit shooting for a timeline on getting married. My sister tells me I'm too picky and stuck in my single ways. And she is right. Anytime Wine Rep wants to do something and I have plans with my friends, I fit him into my plans. I never make plans for just him and I. And really I did that with a lot of guys, not just him. I don't think it's unrealistic to want to be swept off my feet. I mean not literally but if you like me, you need to try really hard. And I do mean do something like singing "Let My Love Open the Door" when you come and knock on my door. That to me would be a big indication of your intentions. And it might make my clothes fall off if added with a guitar. . .

On not having kids, I'm pretty sure this is a personal choice seeing as I would like to either be
a) Married when I have them, or
b) Be in a serious relationship and then become pregnant by accident
I don't want to have an "oops" with a complete stranger. Even though, my dad on many occasions has said that he doesn't care if I get married anymore before I have kids, he just wants more grandkids. And well you all know how adorable my nephew is, so. . .

My friend John brought up a very good argument not too long ago when we were out. He said that as a woman I have the ability to be able to walk up to any guy and say "Hey, want to come back to my place?" and the guy would. While I don't necessarily believe this for me personally, I got to thinking he was right when my friend Jeff told me that he didn't like going to a certain bar because the girls were all too snobby and he wanted to go to a place where the girls went up to him and said "Hey want to go back to my place?" So. . . I guess it all depends on who you ask. . . oh and that whole "I try to have some self-respect so I don't go sleeping with random people thing." I mean I only sleep with people I've known for. . . I don't know. . . at least a week. . . haha!! ;)

Well I have to go for a walk now. . . and wanted to leave this with you from Chelsea Lately:
Paris Hilton doesn't have the Clap. . . she has the Applause.

Thank you Chelsea Handler! haha!