I am here. . . sort of. . .

I have a wrap up of my Holidays but decided it was kind of depressing, but then thought that maybe I should just post it anyway because the content was sincere. So I may still post it anyway or figure out a way to make it not so sappy and make you want to cry and hold a box of kleenex.

My parents are in Hawaii right now. I kind of hate them. They are really nice about calling and sending pictures to my phone though. Thanks Mom and Dad!

What I really was getting on to write about was an article I read today that while I may have already known this, it's hard to read things in print. And that I may need an intervention.

Mixed signal #5: He's always complimenting you and taking you on lots of "dates," but he doesn't even try to kiss you on the lips.
Let's get something straight: Most guys aren't interested in being just friends. If he's whispering lots of sweet nothings and treating you to nice dinners or fun outings, then he's into you—but he's scared that you don't feel the same. "Lots of guys are so afraid of rejection that they can't make that first move," says Feinstein. It'll be up to you to get the ball rolling, she says. "You may think that your interest in him is obvious, but you'll need to send some unambiguous clues that you want things to get physical," she says. So try going for a kiss yourself, or, if that's not your style, try some subtle moves: holding his hand, standing or sitting a wee bit closer to him than normal, or (here's the clincher) letting your eyes linger on his lips while he's talking to you. All clear signs that you're saying, kiss me you fool!

For people that don't know me all that well, this may seem like something that most people may know or figure out or maybe even have this happen to them once or twice. This happens to me on a regular basis. I mean, at the current moment, I could have this situation with 3 guys. Maybe all 3 like me and I wouldn't have a clue. I do know one kind of likes me and I kind of like him, so we have a definite one. In college, this was going on with about 10 different guys. All my good guy friends. All treated me to dinner and movies, out at the bars, walks to get coffee, ice cream, etc. I had guy friends who taped different tv shows for me while I had class at night. One that would pick me up at my night class on days it was raining or there was snow on the ground. My sister would always joke that I didn't need a boyfriend with different guy friends around doing things a boyfriend would do like fix my car or help me hang pictures or move furniture. And she was right. Maybe this is why I automatically make guys' my friends. Because I never realized they wanted or more and I, myself, was scared to lose that friendship. Who knows. I do think I need an intervention. Maybe I need to find more assertive guys??

I thought I would give you a Wine Rep update. The Friday before I left for Christmas, some friends and I went out and he happened to get off work early. Well I have apparently become oblivious to his charms as of lately because as he was walking by me to go talk to one of his friends, he nuzzled my neck and kissed me on the cheek and I didn't even stop talking to my two friends while he did it. Which then prompted MJ to say "Wait, did he just kiss you on the cheek??" to which Emily said "I wasn't even going to mention it!" I said "No, I don't think so." And they both were like "Ummm, yeah, totally kissed you on the cheek while you were in conversation!" I'm oblivious to him. Oblivious. I guess that's what happens when you make plans with me and ditch out like 4 months ago and I make you my friend instead. Apparently it's going to take you more than a month to get me to notice you otherwise. Even though deep down I really do want something to come of this. Plus Wine Rep made bonus points for talking to me on Christmas Eve (but while he was driving in bad weather, which wasn't good) and for asking me to do something before I could ask him! And for saying he really wanted to hang out. Which didn't happen because I had plans I was inviting him to. He did want me to try and fit him in for a bit though between our plans. How cute!! Baby steps though. . . baby steps. . .

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Christmas has always been my favorite time of year. I think it was always because that was when we came back to visit my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and close family friends. I miss those times.

It's weird when your grandparents die. Families seem to go off and do their own things. I miss that but I understand it. I miss spending Christmas's with my mom's side of the family. Now for the most part, we resort to seeing one another at graduations, weddings, or worse, funerals. I, however, have it pretty good here since I moved. I get to see my mom's side quite often which is nice. I get to see my dad's side too, but since Gramps is still alive, we still have family get togethers and Christmas's together. But Christmas is always hard without my grandmas and my other grandpa around.

This year, however, we're missing out on Christmas back here. My Mom and Dad are going to Hawaii the day after Christmas and my cousin and her family are going to see her in-laws in North Carolina the day after, so Christmas just wasn't going to happen. Which to me isn't all that big of a deal because I get to see them quite frequently and I see my Gramps almost every weekend. When I was little, Christmas was one of the five or six times a year I would get to see my extended family and now, I see them often.

Plus, I get a week at home, which I haven't gotten in forever. That's what happens when you move far from home. The guilt of taking vacations and not spending time with your family sinks in. That, and well I have the most adorable nephew ever, so really, it's hard to not want to spend time with him. Everyone keeps saying "You're home for a week??? Good luck!" and partially they are right. It does kind of wear on you all the family time and all but in all honesty, I haven't been back on the weekends for awhile, so I was looking forward to it. Plus my mom loves to wait on me when I get home. She says things like "You go and sit on the couch and I'll clean up the dishes" and then in the next sentence as I drop my plate off at the sink she'll say "Oh hey could you bring those other plates over too??" So much for actually sitting on the couch.

Well my hopes of travelling and seeing friends during the day were subsided by the lovely weather of freezing rain and ice covered roads.

This is what the ice looked like when I first strolled into town. Who would have thunk icicles on icicle lights?!? But on the plus side, this meant that my sister and her family were also stranded with us for a couple of days. This left plenty of time for my family and I to watch movies. Many, many movies including Alvin and the Chipmunks and How to Eat Fried Worms about 5 times each. Because well, my nephew is 3 1/2 and he likes watching movies over and over and over. . . and over. But he's cute, so we let him get away with things. I mean, how can you say no to this face??

The roads were so bad on Christmas Eve due to the freezing rain that even Christmas Eve services were cancelled. So of course, Mom, Dad, and I decide to watch movies after making a batch of homemade egg nog. We thought The Bucket List would be a great movie to watch. I mean it has Morgan Freeman (H don't even say it!!) and Jack Nichalson. I mean we all know it's a heart warming comedy right?? Well, the premise of the movie is simple. It's their list of things to do before they kick the bucket. I mean, you see it in all the previews. However, not a good movie to watch when you find out very recently that your friend's cancer in her liver decided to double in size in two months during her chemo holiday. At the end of the movie, Mom, Dad, and I are all crying. And my Dad?? Not who you would consider a cryer. He wasn't necessarily bawling like Mom and I, but he was definitely teary eyed.

It makes you appreciate everything you have, every moment, every memory. Which I guess you should be thankful for every day . But when someone you're close with is faced with this uncertainty, with this unknown, with this dread that this could be her last everything, it's hard. It makes day to day hard. Those last phone calls. Those last emails. Which when someone passes away unexpectedly it's easier in a way. You regret the last times and how you should have done those things different. I watched my Grandmothers pass away. I had time to say goodbye. I got to say goodbye to my Grandpa right before he died. I told him how much I loved him and how much he meant to me. I saw my great aunt right before she died and told her how much she meant to me. And now I find myself telling that to Josie almost every day. And I find myself saving every email. Every voicemail. Every text. You expect your elders to go before you. Not your good friends. Not someone who is supposed to be there with you when you get married and for the birth of your first child. In my heart and mind, I know she's going to make it. I know she is going to beat this thing. But also, somewhere in the corners is the thought of what if she doesn't. And that I know I need to be prepared for. That is why on Saturday night when I went out with her, I stayed 3 hours later than I wanted to.

It was also cute because I was staying with my sister and my nephew wanted me to sleep with him in his bed. And when I told him I was going out with one of my friends he said "Are you leaffing me A??" and I said "Yeah buddy. I'm going out with Josie tonight for a bit." And he said "Josie that I pray for every night??" Me: "Yep" Then he said "That's okay then. Give her a big hug for me then. But not too hard because she's sick." And then he gave me a hug. Later as I was doing my hair, he came up to me and said "Is she going to die??" And I said "I hope not." And he said "People with cancer die right?? She's going to die??" And I said "Hopefully not buddy. That's why we pray for her to get better." And he said "I don't want her to die either. I'll keep praying for her to be better." It was too cute. And of course, it left my sister and I teary eyed.

My nephew also has a hard problem with my leaving. Such as he will ignore me and stay as far away from me as possible an hour or so before I leave. He will initially hug me when I get there and then since I usually am only there for a weekend, by Sunday, he's already getting mad at me for having to leave. This weekend was not an exception. And on Sunday when I asked him why he wouldn't hug me, he said it's because I always leave him. Well I was there a week, and he was loving all of his auntie time. So the next Sunday, when I was actually supposed to leave, we didn't tell him I was leaving. . .until about 10 minutes before I did. And he threw a little fit of course. But when I said I was leaving and turned, he came running up to me and kissed me. And then had this look on his face:

Okay not really this face. This one he was making on purpose earlier because he enjoys making not normal faces for his aunt. What a stinker! But he was really, really sad.

My drive back home was good. I love driving on good roads that are clear of snow and ice. It's like the best way to drive anywhere.

Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays to whatever you celebrate. I hope you got to be with your loved ones and your close friends and got to spend that extra time with them.

It's snowing and -6 degrees. . . and you??

Whenever the weather is crappy and people ask how I am, I always tell them the weather so they can make the judgement as to how I am. I also do this when I'm stuck at work on nice days except I add that I'm also stuck at work.




I LOVE snow. I hate snow when I have to drive in it. BOOOO. But I've said this before, so I hate to be a broken record.





My Mom told me that I need to change my facebook profile pic to something that I look pretty in. She said that I just don't look pretty in my picture. My glasses aren't on my face fully, my hair is a mess. . . and I'm holding a penis cookie. So I changed it to this:

H made the comment that the picture is MUCH better. Now I just look like an alcoholic. I told her, while that is true, it's actually a really cool picture because while I am completely not moving, it looks like everyone else behind me is moving really fast. It's artistic. :)

Wine Rep made the comment on Friday night when I suggested that I just make dinner on Sunday as opposed to going out for dinner that he may need to find out my ring size and go ring shopping instead. Yes, it creeped me out. And on Sunday when we had tentative plans (not even fully fledged plans) he actually let me know that after his wine tasting that if he didn't call me, he was having to help his friend finish moving. This is what I call progress. And no, I'm not falling hook, line, and sinker yet!

Dean made the comment last week that he misses all the people he and I used to hang out with. And on Saturday night I hung out with all those people and told them that. They didn't seem to care too much seeing as Dean was the one that broke my heart. And I didn't have the heart to tell him on Saturday night when he asked what I was up to when he got off work to tell him that. And I know last year he made the comment about how much he liked everyone but they were my friends and I said "No, they're your friends too." Which at the time was accurate because the guys would call him to hang out now and then. No matter how awesome you are, if then you go and break this girl's heart, you can forget that my friends would talk to you again. But I would never tell him that either.

I love Joel McHale from The Soup.

I think I might have a girl crush on Chelsea Handler as well. I keep staying up to watch Chelsea Lately instead of going to sleep. I need help. And why is she so funny?!?

My neighbor ran into my cousin MJ at the bar on Saturday night and told her that I'm super nice and. . .she's not. haha!

I love HIMYM and the Naked episode still is probably the funniest yet.

Did I mention it's colder than all get out here and snowing?? Not as cold as yesterday but cold.

What happens when you're drinking wine and making Christmas Cookies. . .

So last night we had a Girl's night where we got together and made Christmas Cookies. Now, I go all out as in making my Grandma's Christmas Sugar Cookie recipe which basically calls for a cup of sugar and cream. REAL cream. They are delicious. And I make homemade frosting.



Last night we drank wine while we did this and my neighbor Mike stopped by. Well, you can only guess what happened at the end of the evening when we had left over dough and decided each of us would create our own cookie.


This is what we got. . .




Lynn thought it would be funny to do a penis. . . and well when it was Mike's turn. . . well you see what happened. . .


In my new glasses, I definitely look like a dirty librarian too.


Oh and I already received a Christmas miracle on Sunday. And by miracle I mean that Wine Rep told me to call him on Sunday and he would come over for lunch. And I called him, he answered, AND he came over. He even quit watching the Packers game to come over and eat some chili. Granted, I had other people over and he only stayed a couple of hours to hang out with me and my two other friends that were over. . . but this is an improvement. Now he said he would try and give me a call this week to do supper but he's really busy this week. So if he calls, I might have to rethink my stance on him. He might just have realized what he needs to do to really woo me! haha! I mean. . . besides all the free wine he gives me.

Finally!!

I think I am buying this for most of my single guy friends for Christmas. . .

It was written by a 9-year-old and the exerpts from it are so darn cute and pretty right on!

It's hilarious. And kind of funny that I kind of share the same girl values that a 9-year-old girl would.

Also. . .thanks to the ONE person that responded with advice. You guys kind of suck! :) Kidding. Well maybe. . . hehe!

Hangman's Woods

Scary isn't it?? Can you see the cloudish like fog? There was no fog anywhere that night. I think those are ghosts?? I wish I would have gotten a picture of the barn but it was just creepy enough to get a picture of the woods. I should probably delete the picture off of my phone incase it brings me bad luck or something. . . hmmm. . .

I need your advice...Please. . .

This has really been kind of nagging on me all day and I really don't know what to do. And I could really use your help and advice in answering this.

I was having a conversation in which someone told me that I have a weird or loose definition of the word "Friend." I was like Huh?? And I was told that when I to go out to supper with a guy alone that constitutes as a date not a friend, especially when they pay. And I, of course, disagree with this. And even if I happen to make out with them, we are still friends.

Then she says that you can't still be friends with someone you once were previously in love with.
Which I disagree with. She then brought up the point that although Dean is a really great person (and someone she just became friends with on Facebook) that I need to quit talking to him as long as he has a girlfriend now.

And it's not a surprise that it's weird that he has a girlfriend and keeps telling me about their problems and asking for advice, but it's weird because looking back I was in love with him for a lot longer than I realized.

She says the main reason for this is because last Monday (the Monday before Thanksgiving) he was on his way home from work and called me to see how I was doing* and asked if he could stop by to give me a hug tomorrow night because he was really tired and just got off his 2nd job and was almost home. I told him that I was headed home tomorrow and not to worry about stopping by because he was almost home. But he turned around and came by at 10:30 to give me a hug. Okay. He ended up giving me two hugs. But still.

It's weird, yes. But he's my friend. We're close. That's what close friends do, right?? Then she said if she was his girlfriend, she probably wouldn't appreciate him doing that for another girl. So last night when he called I never picked up nor returned his call. I feel bad for that. He was just calling to see how my Thanksgiving was. I haven't talked to him in over a week. Granted, I was home for most of last week. And yes we do still talk at least once a week.

But she is right. I don't know what he's told this new girl about me. Or if at one time that I was in love with him. I mean, if I knew my boyfriend was really close friends with a girl that used to be in love with him, I don't know how I'd feel. And really, he's confused enough about whether or not he wants to be dating this girl. Could I be making it worse somehow even though he just thinks of me as a friend?? It's not like he has feelings for me.

There's a lot of stuff going on right now in my life and it would be super tough not to have him to rely on for it. I do realize that for some reason we are super close and I can't help that. But what do I do?!? Do I quit talking to him?

*My friend Josie's cancer doubled in size again in her liver in two months time. They put her on a chemo holiday and it doubled in size. This isn't good obviously. But they didn't think she would live 6 months when they discovered it metastasized in her liver in February. But it had shrunk in half with the chemo and without the hormones. But then rapidly doubled without the 2 months of chemo. Stupid Cancer!! I should post one of her emails on here, so you can see her strength and optimism. Definitely keep her in your thoughts!

I'm stuck. . .

Not that I have mental block or anything like that. . . well. . . I guess that might be debatable. . .


No I'm stuck back home in IL. Last night when I went to bed there was talk of 1-2 inches of snow. I laugh at 1-2 inches of snow. But what I don't laugh at is completely and partially covered interstates. No sirree. I do not laugh at those. I had to drive 4 times last year on those suckers and I refuse to do it now. And with fog this time. No thanks! Around 3pm today most of the roadways I would take to get back home, were now clear of ice and snow and were what the IDOT says are "wet". But seeing as I would be driving in the dark and with Holiday traffic then for the majority of my route, I just didn't want to chance anything. And I don't know why leaving at 6am to drive back is a good idea or not. I know my parents for sure appreciate it!


I am definitely thankful for my family and friends. And this week/weekend I always get to see my friends from high school. And I miss them more than they know sometimes. Especially my guy friends. It doesn't matter how old we get, they somehow go back to how we were in high school. And for some reason this time, we decided to relive some of our high school days by driving after the bars to our old haunts. Like through the high school parking lot. . . to the old haunted cemetery by the high school. . . in the country like we were going to an old friend's house. . . to Hangman's Barn. . .through Thadd's Road. . . and then back by the grade school. And we did this until 4am. I don't know what's wrong with us either. Thank goodness I quit drinking after the bar as I would have felt like shit like the rest of the guys. . .and maybe Kaci. :)

Out of all the Haunts. . . Hangman's is still the creepiest. I'll post a pic when I get back to my computer and upload my pics. You can see it's creepiness then. Hangman's is barn off of a country road in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of the woods, with a small creek running by it, up a worn dirt path, where a guy supposedly hung himself many, many years ago. And if you look through the barn, you can supposedly see him still swinging. Now I can't say that I ever actually saw him because like I have mentioned before, my guy friend's are jerks, and whenever we would start to walk up to the barn, they would take off and run away from me. And I never quite made it up to the barn with the flashlight by myself because I am a complete and utter chicken. I actually got close enough to see the barn this year. . . from the car. . . and it was creepy. I'm sorry I can't think of any other adjective other than creepy.

I love going back home. I think in a way it boosts my self-esteem up if only momentarily. I was told that I was in the top 20 prettiest girl's at the bar. Then I realized there were only 20 girls. . . and then was upgraded to top 10. Thanks. My friend Kaci (normally a medium to dark brown) and Stephanie (blonde to light brown) both had died their hair really dark brown which prompted David to ask if there was a Goth convention in town. And which prompted David and Dustin (more David) to always refer to Stephanie as Medusa, Witch, or Dark Magic the whole night. Or for one of them to ask what type of Voodoo she was into now. But don't think Stephanie let them get away with it. Her typical response was "I can't hear you because you're balding." They didn't pick on Kaci as much because as they both stated when Stephanie mentioned they weren't picking on Kaci was that she usually had dark brown hair but that it's only slightly darker now.

On Saturday it was nice to have lunch with my other good friends from high school. We all live far away from each other, and now that two out of the four have children, we are only able to get together like twice a year as opposed to every other month or every two months like we used to. I guess that's the sucky part of being a grown up now.

**UPDATE**
I did make it back safely. It just took forever today. My normal 45-60 minute drive took 2.5 hours. I got stuck going up a hill when a semi was quasi jack knifed on the road and ditch and the snow plow I was following stopped to help him which caused me having to stop. Which then caused me being stuck on the icy slope known as the hill in the road. So after some attempts of putting sand by my tires I got unstuck for a car length and then stuck again. So a nice group of guys in a truck tried to push me up the hill as opposed to using their truck to do it, but they couldn't get a grip on the road to actually push me, seeing as it was a sheet of ice. Luckily they had a rope in their car and decided to pull me all the way up the hill instead as this would be much safer. I thank them sooo much. Stupid, stupid snow. But it's only stupid when I have to drive in it and it drifts over the road causing it to be unsafe for me. :)

Wedding Bells

Again, not mine. But I am totally and utterly fine with that. . . maybe. . . ;)

Anyway, D$ is getting married on Saturday!! WAHOO!!!!!!

Congrats! Congrats!!!

I wonder if she'll let me post pics on here?? I'll definitely post them of my nephew because he's the ring bearer. And he's utterly adorable.

Why it's nice to be me. . .

So last night I went over to my friend Sarah's so we could mess with my hair and see how I should wear it for the wedding this weekend. Well Sarah jokes that we could drink wine while we're doing it because it's definitely been one of those weeks.

Well Wine Rep lives by her so I suggest I'll just go over there and get some. I texted him and said "Hey is it okay if I steal some wine from you today?" Later in the afternoon he texts me back and says that it's okay, but he has strep throat, and he doesn't want me to get it, so he'll just put some by the front door. He said he'd probably be passed out in his bed when I got there.

Yeah, he totally was out. And he put a whole case by the front door.

How nice is that?? Seriously??

And don't worry. . . we didn't drink the whole case. Just a couple of bottles between three of us girls.

And Sarah made Tator Tot casserole. It was delicious.

And obviously I learned from my mistake the prior week of drinking wine on an empty stomach. Oh and I probably only had maybe 3 glasses of wine. If that. Instead of the whole bottle and a half I had by myself last week. Yeah. . .

So this one time. . .

I must say that I absolutely LOVE my mom.

And all of her weird quirks.

When you move out away from Home, it's always your mom that gets stuck calling and telling you bad news. My Dad called me once with bad news when his Mom died, and he wanted to call us at 2am and my Mom said that he should wait. So he waited until 5am. When I was little we always joked because the only time my Dad's Mom seemed to call was when she had bad news or birthdays. My Mom, however, calls me almost every morning on her drive. And then acts surprised when I am getting ready for work.

Anyway, for awhile, it seemed my Mom was calling and then would say "Oh yeah, this person has cancer now or this person isn't doing well or this person is really sick." And then she would joke and say she turned into my Grandma Mona. And we would laugh.

Well my mom dropped the ball this weekend. On Friday at 7:30pm my sister calls me and is crying hysterically because her dog got his by a truck and died about an hour ago. And Gunner, was a pretty awesome dog. They got him as a puppy when my sister was pregnant with my nephew, so basically the dog and my nephew have grown up together. So it is pretty sad.

On Saturday I go to Gramps and we get to talking about how one of my cousins is the assistant coach for the school's State Bound Football team. And Gramps asked how he was related and I said "Oh his Mom and my Mom are 1st cousins. Our Grandpas are brothers." And then he goes on to say how he didn't know my Great Uncle all that well. Fast forward to later in the afternoon when Gramps and I are reading the paper. And Gramps says "Your uncle died." And I said "WHAT???"

So I call my parents right away thinking that maybe one of Mom's siblings dropped the ball in calling any of us. My Dad was too lazy to get off the chair to bring Mom the phone while she was sitting at her chair and asks why I need to talk to Mom. I tell him and he starts laughing. "Cath-you forgot to tell A that Harold died on Friday." Not nice Mom. But I did feel a little better seeing as she forgot to tell my sister as well. So on my way home from Gramps I am talking to her on the phone and she says "So are you going to represent the family??" And I said "Mom, while I would like to do that, I would have waited to see Gramps today had I known the visitation was tomorrow. That's another 3 hours drive."

I started to feel guilty. And called my uncle and he told me not to worry that our side would be represented well because my other aunts and he were all going and none of the great nieces and nephews were on our side, so I shouldn't feel obligated.

I hadn't seen my great uncle for almost two and a half years. He was in the same care center as my Grandpa and once Grandpa died, I couldn't bring myself to go there and visit anymore. And what's even sadder, is that the last time I saw him was at my Grandpa's funeral. And the last real one-on-one conversation I remember having with him was at my Grandpa's death bed. I was close to him growing up seeing as he lived next to my Grandparents. But he was 95 and he lived a great life. He had dementia so it was a blessing. I just kind of miss the last connection to my other Grandpa.

It's just weird that this month, we lost a close family friend and my great uncle and Gunner. It's also weird that all my Grandpa's brothers died around Holidays. My Grandpa's oldest brother died the week before Christmas when I was in 8th grade. My Grandpa died the day before Father's Day. And my uncle died close to Veteran's Day and Thanksgiving.

Woah. Not meaning to be a Debbie Downer!! Sorry! I'm okay really. Now if it was my Gramps or H's Grandparents I would be an absolute basket case. I am ridiculously close to her Grandparents. And sometimes MJ (H and her are 1st cousins) and I joke that they like me better than her because I see them more. Which probably isn't true. . . maybe. . .

Dear HIMYM,

We have a problem. And it's you. It's not me. I liked you. I really liked you. In fact, I thought that I might have loved you. But recent events have caused me to question you. And my relationship with you. And how I thought I knew the real you. Everything was happy, and then you just went and disappointed me. And left me scarred.

Speidi?? Really?? As a guest? You can't even call them guests really. Nor can you call them actual people. Spencer makes me kind of gag in my mouth. And Heidi. . . well. . . they are worse than Paris Hilton. And that's really saying a lot. I feel their 15 minutes of fame are up and you HIMYM are just helping and enabling them.

It hurts that you would choose them in a way over me. We had something and you made it cheap. I'm not saying I won't stay close to you. . . I'm just saying it's going to be hard to go back to where things were. It will take awhile. Give me some time to work through my issues and then I'll re-evaluate where we are at. But until then, I'm holding a grudge.

Sincerely,

A

Is this ESP?!?

I think it's funny how there are some people in your life you just have this certain connection to. You can only know them for a short time yet they can read your mind and finish your sentences. Or you can know them forever and they know absolutely nothing about you.

Today the latter happened. I was hanging out with Jenna and Johnathon this afternoon since I hadn't seen them in forever, and Jenna asked me if I had seen the moving Saving Silverman. I said that no I haven't seen the movie yet. Then when Johnathon gets done putting up the walls in the basement he comes up and Jenna informs him we are going to get the movie Saving Silverman at the Red Box, and Johnathon said that when he looked the other day it wasn't there. And we were both in shock that it wouldn't be there. And then we both realized that the name of the movie is actually Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I knew exactly what movie she was talking about even though she wasn't saying the correct name of the movie. I also have seen Saving Silverman numerous times and love that movie for some unbeknownst reason. I have no idea how I knew what she was talking about! haha!!

I also enjoyed Forgetting Sarah Marshall. However, I do feel that someone should have warned me that I would be seeing a frontal of Jason Segel about 7 times. And I guess thank you Jason Segel for allowing me to now picture you naked every time I watch HIMYM. Or not thank you. I'm not sure yet. . .

Just a Friendly Reminder. . . because I forgot. . .

Never, EVER drink a lot of wine on a virtually empty stomach and then don't eat supper.

This morning I had a slight headache and by slight headache I mean I thought my temples were going to explode. I even got up and worked out and showered and then all of a sudden I thought I was going to hurl! Not good.

My friend Casey came over after work and we were just going to drink one bottle of wine. I had a nice assortment of Leftse, wrapper cheese, Tomato and Basil Wheat thins, pepperoni, these new cheddar Lays cracker crisps, and Baked Sour Cream and Cheddar Lays. Talk about a spread! haha! Anyway, I should state. . . I ate some crackers, cheese, pepperoni, and some Leftse. Not in the amount that one would call filling by any means. Well as Casey and I finished off the bottle of red wine, we decided to open a bottle of white. Just about as Dean got to my place we finished the white.

This is also the point in time where I am pretty tipsy. So Dean starts talking about the new girl and Casey gives him her advice on it. That he shouldn't date her if he's not sure about her in the first place. And when he asks my advice I just simply state, I cannot comment on these things.

Well Casey leaves like an hour after she was supposed to be home, and Dean turns to me and asks why I can't comment on these things. But before I could answer he asks me if I think this new girl is cute. And I said "Honestly?" And he says "Yes." And I said "She's not cute. I'm prettier than she is." And he said "She's not that ugly." And I told him that it doesn't matter what I think anyway. He then asks if I texted him awhile ago that she was ugly. And when I drink I cannot lie to save my life and I was honest and told him. . .then quickly added "But I didn't mean to!!!" He then goes back to the original question of why can't a I comment. And so I bluntly tell him "It's because really no one that you date will ever be good enough because frankly they aren't me. You broke my heart and that's just the way it goes."

At this point in time his head is laying on my counter because I'm pretty sure I said more than that but that was the gist as to what I said. And he said "I'm sorry for breaking your heart. I didn't mean to." And I simply state "Well, you did. And it's done. And we're cool. Case Closed."

We start talking about other things and I think we're still friends, so I guess that's good. I already talked to him today and he responded. He's got a doctor's appointment today and he wants me to go to the hospital. I doubt he'll ever hang out with me alone again, but whatever. I got a lot of things off my chest, so I feel better. . . well sort of. . .my head still feels like it's detached from my body.

Is it me or is that song in your head too?

I hate when you hear a quote or something and then it just HITS you like a ton of bricks. And the sure impact of the comment has you thinking about a million different things now.

As I was watching TV the other night--Samantha Who? to be exact--the comment was made which stated "If you have to answer that you're "just friends" it probably means there is more than just friends to begin with."

I don't know why this comment just puzzles me. I guess because I have had several guy friends and guys who I wanted to be more than just friends with that this question has been asked of. But really that's my only thoughts about it. Is it a true statement?? Or is it just a good line from a good tv show?? I don't know.

I also wonder that why whenever my boss is in town I end up paying for dinner. He makes 3 times as much as I do. I do get to expense it, but last night our tab was $108 and well in my book, that's a lot of money and I had to pay for it and wait a week to get reimbursed. I really don't make that much money.

My boss also told me last night that I could probably just come and go as I please as long as I get things done either at home or in the office. But I know that if I just came and went as I pleased, so would my employees who aren't even good about getting things done like they should when they ARE in the office.

One of my employees is being completely bitchy to me today too. And has been a lot with me lately. And you know the funny thing?? This is the first time she's been here this week. Monday she was supposed to have a half day but her boyfriend reset the alarm when he woke up because he thought she had the day off. So she calls me at 9:30 when she woke up (Mind you I called her at 8:30) and told me what happened. We had Tuesday off for Veteran's Day (Thank you Veterans, and my dad, grandpa, uncles, etc that fought for our country and our freedoms) and then yesterday she took a sick day again. She has a lot of migraines (at least once or twice a month), and she can't come in or something like that. And I am nice and just let her make up her time and not even that weekend. Sometimes she makes up the time like months later. So really, being bitchy to me is not the way to go.

I had some other things in my head. . .but can't think of them at the moment.

I have a confession. . .

I'm watching Law & Order: SVU. . . and Jesse McCartney is on there. . . and well. . . I love you Jesse McCartney. I think you're maybe 21. Maybe. You've aged well my friend. You've aged well. You're sooo much cuter than that Zach Efron.

My Best Friend's Wedding

minus of course Julia Roberts, Rupert Everett, and Dermot Mulroney. Oh and me telling Ryan that I am in love with him, he can't marry his girlfriend, and he must marry me instead hours before he is supposed to walk down the aisle.

As I mentioned before, Ryan and I never had that weird, awkward relationship. EVER. Which is wonderful sometimes. I always had a date to things with him that I greatly appreciated.

Well Ryan was absolutely 100% right that I would know 3 people for sure and kind of know 1 other person. But don't worry, I made friends.

At the wedding, Tim sat me by Joel's brother Jeremy, his Mom, his Dad, and his Grandma who by the way is awesome. Later Joel told me his grandma told him what a great girl I was. Yep. I'm well aware! Duh. After the wedding was done and we were waiting for the bride and groom, I went up to Jeremy and Tim, who were talking to these 2 girls and when I walked up the 1 girl was saying how she found out she would be drinking water tonight. I asked Jeremy if he wouldn't mind saving me a seat at the reception. Jeremy said sure and Tim informed me that since he was just an usher, he wasn't sitting with the bridal party and could sit by me. Then the 2 girls said that since I didn't know anyone, I could sit with them and their parents. I thanked them for their hospitality and said that perhaps I would take them up on it. Then I realized I had met the one girl Brooke before in college. And probably hadn't seen her in like 6 years.

I had an hour and a half to burn between the wedding and reception and no one to burn it with. I tried calling Jill, Sarah, Wyatt, and Jeremy and no one answered. And because I have this weird thing about sitting at the bar by myself when I'm not waiting on people, I decided to hang out at my favorite bookstore, Pages for All Ages. I miss that bookstore.

Anyway, so I went to the reception and Jeremy and his family weren't there yet, so I sort of wander and look around and see Brooke and her family, so I sit with them. And thank goodness her sister Courtney wanted to go grab another drink. I told her how I was going to get a drink but I didn't want to be that girl standing at the reception all by herself with no friends drinking heavily. I totally made her my new best friend with that comment.

Well Courtney and Brooke grew up with Ryan, Joel, and Tim so they were telling me all these stories about them growing up and I was telling them stories that used to happen in college. This would also be about the time I started putting my foot in my mouth. . . repeatedly. . . and only two captain and diets in. I get this from my Dad. He does it on a regular basis, except he isn't aware that he's even doing it.

Let the foot comments begin:
Number 1:
Me: I'm kind of mad at Ryan for not telling me his sister is pregnant.
Courtney and Brooke: Ryan's sister isn't pregnant.
Me: Oh. . . that's right! It's you that's pregnant right??
Brooke: Oh my God! How'd you hear that??
Me: I think I must have heard you tell Tim today and then got confused and thought it was Ryan's sister! Sorry!!
Save. Thank goodness for my listening and remembering skills. I am pretty chubby. And Ryan's sister used to be super skinny. And apparently she has gained a lot of weight since I saw her 4 years ago. And it's all in her hips and lower stomach. Where you would carry weight if you were say pregnant or just had a baby. And since she didn't have a baby with her, I thought the latter. Yep. I am THAT girl now.

Number 2:
Me: Ooooh wait. . . wasn't there a Brooke that Joel was in love with like forever??
Courtney: I KNEW IT!! Joel did carry a torch for you forever!!
Me: This is awkward.
Brooke: Yeah I dated Tim in high school for awhile and then Senior year I dated Joel briefly and it almost caused an end to their friendship. But they worked it out.
Me: And apparently never talked about it again. . .
Brooke: So Joel liked me for awhile in college??
Me: Well. . . I mean. . .uhh. . . yeah. . . sometimes we had to go out to where you were at. . . and he'd always be really excited for you to come to their parties. . .
Thank goodness they only knew of this one time that I put my foot in my mouth. . .

I really only had two instances where I really put my foot in my mouth. The remainder of the night, Courtney took on the task.

Jeremy came and sat at our table and then Tim did when the wedding party arrived. Well when Tim sat down, Courtney grabbed his hand and said "So Andrea just told us how Joel used to have this crush on Brooke. And this was right after Mom was telling her how you used to come over and cry and tell her how much you liked Brooke." Then Tim says "Awwwkward. Thank goodness Andrea isn't my wife. And Andrea, I never cried. Maybe wined." Then when Joel sits down later, I inform him of my snafu, and he tells me that he's glad I came. And told Brooke how he pined for her for years and good thing her husband wasn't there to punch him!

Courtney kept telling me how much I acted like their sister's friend Casey, so she kept calling me Casey all night. Which was pretty funny. And it was nice how instantly Courtney, Brooke, and I clicked that night. They were the old friends that had remained close and I was the kind of new. Since Courtney and Brooke live back where my parents do now, we're going to hang out, so that was nice.

Tim was talking to me about how Joel was his Best Man and how he choked on his speech and just ended up saying "I'm usually a man of many words, but now I only have few. Congrats Tim on your marriage!!" So then about 10 minutes later, Joel sits down next to me and starts telling me how he wrote Ryan's speech last night when he got back home from the bar at 3am and Tim overhears him and says "Well at least HE gets a speech!" But I pointed out to Tim how he isn't bitter and Tim says "Well at least I dated Brooke longer!" haha!!

Quotes that I remember that were hilarious. . . at the time:
Joel in his speech saying how he and Ryan and him done a lot together through the years and started naming all the things he couldn't forget and says "Suspect #3 ran on foot"

Jeremy (who's 6'6") says to Courtney when she asks if he's gotten taller says "It's the pin stripes. They make you look taller."

Jeremy while sitting at the table starts saying (and showing) how his socks that match both his pin striped shirt and slacks and how he has to get his shirts tailored because he's so tall and his waist is so small. . . then says "I sound like a woman. I'll quit. I'm scaring myself."

Tim reminding me that Ryan used to hook up with a lot of my friends. . . in front of Ryan's new wife.

Joel to me "Hey remember when you told Brooke that I used to pine after her for years?? Yeah, that was cool."

Tim saying "Why on earth do you always go for midgets?" after Jeremy got done dancing with a girl that was maybe 5 foot. I told him that was mean and Jeremy says "No, he's right. My last girlfriend was 4'8". I think I like them right at my crotch."

Yeah, yeah, yeah. . .

I'm alive. I was told that I haven't updated anything and there was some "Dying in anticipation" or something. I think she was only using "Dying" in the sense that she is just sarcastic and just wants something to do to avoid work. That's all I'm saying.

A few things really quick in order of my week so far.

1) Yes I'll give you the wedding write-up and even one about Halloween. Maybe even with pictures!! Of course if we're friends on facebook, you already have seen the pictures. And if not, look at them, they're posted.

2) My sister turned 33. WOAH.

3) A close friend of the family passed away.

4) I met O.A.R! Yeah, pretty awesome. And they are shorter than I expected. :)

5) Obama is President!!! Words cannot describe this. The other guy from IL that was elected to the presidency did a fantastic job in the short time he was in office. I'm hoping the same can be said again.

6) I met the girl Dean is seeing. I got diarrhea of the mouth. And don't you think it would be appropriate to say WARN someone that "Oh hey, the girl I'm seeing is coming to soccer and since I know you are too, just wanted to give you a heads up." Yeah. Didn't happen. Thank goodness someone got hurt and I had to tend to them right away, so she got a little less diarrhea of the mouth. Plus it's just weird because you don't know what or how much he has told her about me. This might have to be a post all itself! haha!!!

Miley Cyrus. . . I hate you. . . .

I got the Miley Cyrus CD because my niece was driving back with me this weekend and I wanted to be the cool aunt. And you know what?? I like Miley. And I hate her for it.

The song "7 Things" I could sing over and over and over again.
Here's some sample lyrics:

I probably shouldn't say this

But at times I get so scared

When I think about the previous

Relationship we shared

It was awesome but we lost it

It's not possible to care

And now we're standing in the rain

But nothing's ever gonna change

Until you hear, my dear

The 7 Things I hate about you

The 7 things I hate about you, oh you

You're vain, your games, you're insecure

You love me, you like her

You make me laugh, you make me cry

I don't know which side to buy

Your friends they're jerks,

When you act like them you know it hurts

I wanna be with the one I know

And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do

You make me love you.

And it's all true. I could think of a couple of guys I could sing that to right now.

Granted that's really the only song I really like on the CD. My niece made me go to other songs on the CD that she liked a lot. She was soo excited when I started to play it. Yep. Cool Aunt. Cool Aunt.

I will have a post of the wedding weekend. It was a great time. And very quotable. Which I realized I should have written down some of the quotes so I could actually remember them. Oh well!

Too weird not to share. . .

I came across this and had to share. . .

I just couldn't believe it. I think I am actually speechless on this!

You can always make friends. . .

This weekend is my best guy friend from college's wedding. I had a lot of guy friends in college but Ryan and I were probably the closest. And never had that awkward thing between us that one of us was attracted to the other or anything. We were like brother and sister.

Well my original date for the wedding cancelled. And then my backup cancelled because he found out he had to work. So I'm going to the wedding dateless. Which usually wouldn't be that big of a deal because I have gone to many a weddings without a date.

The kicker is that I will know 3 people there Ryan figures--The Groom, the Best Man-Joel, and another Groomsmen-Tim.

Ryan and a ton of his friends from high school all went to college together, and I actually became really good friends with Ryan and Joel. I met them at the same time. And then subsequently became pretty good friends with their friends from high school. However, the friends that I would know that would be invited from high school?? Not able to come. Tim's wife who I have never met but knew would be sitting by herself because Tim's in the wedding?? Not able to be there.

I was starting to get really worried when Ryan informed me they aren't having assigned seating at the reception because they didn't want the hassle. But then I called Joel to see if his brother was coming. And he is. So Joel said that he would re-introduce me to his parents and his brother so I can have someone to sit with. Whew! I'll let you know how it goes! :)

I jumped in. . . and the water was cold. . .

So. . . I left a pretty cryptic message on doing something on Sunday.

Well. . . here it is. . .

My friend Dan made me sign up for online dating. And if you're asking yourself "MADE you?? Did he have a gun to your head?" Not exactly but he did sit right next to me and wouldn't say a word to me nor leave my place until I signed up. So I did. I mean my cousin met his awesome wife online. So I thought, "Why not?"

There is a reason I don't like online dating. It really creeps me out when someone sends me an email that says "Hey. How are you? You're beautiful!" Which Dan informs me there are worse things that people could write to me. But it creeps me out.

This guy had been super persistent about talking me. And it creeped me out, his persistence. However, I thought that I needed to give him a chance and we had been talking on email. Then he asked me to go out to dinner or lunch sometime. I made time for him on for Sunday Lunch. On Friday when I talked to him for the first time on the phone, he told me that he was telling his friend at the bar that I played Kickball and if I played Trench, he would have to ask for my ring size when we met. Yes, he said that to me. Out Loud. The person he had only been talking to on email for about 2 weeks and the person he hadn't met yet. But still I thought, I do need to meet this guy. Especially because I was getting a TON of pressure from H and my friends Sarah and JB.

And well, no sparks flew. We don't have anything in common. He listens to old school Christian music. I listen to Christian music but like Jeremy Camp and lots of other music. Not stuff like Big Band and Orchestra Christian music. He seems to really like his dog. Like his dog apparently eats popcorn out of the bowl with him. And he's 5'5". The height thing I knew going into it, but Dan being 5'8" said that he gets discriminated a lot because of his height and I needed to give the guy a chance. I would date Dan because besides having an awesome personality he's at eye level. But I think the guy was making up 5'5". I was wearing flats and seemed to look over his head. I'm 5'7". And I need to be with a guy that really enjoys playing sports. I don't think he played sports. He does watch sports though. And he was telling me how his roommate just didn't seem to understand that the bathroom needs to be cleaned like twice a week. I don't even clean my bathroom twice a week. And Dan informed me as a guy it should be like twice a month at MOST.

As I was talking to my Dad yesterday and telling him this, he so ever kindly said "You're not desperate enough for online dating yet!" This coming from the man that keeps asking when am I going to find a guy, get married, and have kids. Then he added "You haven't tapped out your guy friends yet." And maybe he's right. I have a lot of guy friends. An over abundance of guy friends really. But the single ones are starting to dwindle. But maybe in a way my Dad is right. Maybe I'm not quite ready to settle down and get married and go online to find my husband or boyfriend for that matter. The two girls in my office went online and found two great guys. One is now engaged. So I know it works. I'm going to try it for another month. We'll see.

And I realize again, that I am not a looker, but my Mom and Dad say I'm a catch. ;)

How's that again??

I just made up a title. It has nothing to do with my post. :)

Some things that happened to me this week: I met Sonya Kitchell. She had one of those Stripped studio things at one of the local radio stations. I got free lunch and got to listen to her perform an intimate concert. Of course she didn't play my favorite song, but she has some new good ones out.

I realize that sometimes you have to take chances in life and jump in with both feet first. I'm doing that on Sunday. I'm not sure how it will go, but I'll let you know.

I really have nothing else to offer today. . . except some email exerts from my friend and neighbor Mike who I think has been bored at work this week. But has made me laugh out loud. He is single ladies. . .and cute. . . And for some reason at Kickball decided to wear a "I (HEART) Vagina" shirt. And I said "Really Mike?? That shirt??" And he said "Sometimes you have to wear shirts that make you and others feel uncomfortable. And you have to be That Guy. So you're welcome. For being THAT guy."

The first email he sent me was in response to an 80s email he sent regarding all of our favorite 80s things. Our friend Emily responded with this comment: I was in a jean jacket club. No lie. I also had the best bangs in a twenty mile radius…

This was Mike's Response:

Is that cause they could see them for 20 miles? Don't feel bad, sometimes, late at night if I can't sleep, I get up and go to my closet. There sitting in the back corner, on the highest shelf, sits an old dusty box covered in stickers of Garbage Pale kids, Smurfette, Alf, and other ICONS (yes I said Icons) of my childhood. I gently pull it out, barely able to breathe in anticipation of the treasures that lay within. When I open it I'm instantly transported back in time. A time that conjures up feelings of hopes and dreams of one day being an astronaut, police officer or an accountant. A simpler time when all you needed to have in order to be "cool" was a shirt that itself could outshine the sun, jeans washed in gravel and rolled so tight around the ankle that you could barely walk. All the knowledge that you needed to have was which member of NYOTB (I was going to correct it but I thought it just hysterical that he wrote that instead of NKTOB) was dating who, where Blossom got her hats, and how to win at Oregon trail (always buy the extra wheel, no matter the cost!!!) After I get the clothes on I turn to the slap bracelets, yes in all their outstanding vivid color (even though they have faded slightly over the years). I pull out the magic "MASH" game, it was a glorious day that day, May 5th 1988, all the moons were aligned that day I tell you, that was the day the perfect future was laid out for me, I was to marry Holly Ann Turnbuckle (just the mere mention of her name brought goose bumps to any 10 year old boy). After a long day of being an ice cream plant taste tester I was to drive home to her in our huge mansion in Rome via our Lamborghini. Ahh what a day, I still look back and smile slightly, with a sort of dishearten feeling as I know that will never come true (due to Holly Ann now being a man calling herself Cliff). I then slide in the VHS tapes of the Fresh Prince and move on to Saved by the Bell where I always laugh with anticipation of what hi-jinks Screech and Zach will get into next. ( I really hope Zach and Kelli work things out). After a few hours of this I am ready for dreamland and as I lay my head back down on my pillow (wrist all red and sore from slapping the bracelets on) with a smile is say, WOAH.... WOAH... dreams a coming.

Then this morning he sends me this with the subject of "Warning to My Kickball Opponent":

Ahhh, the air is crisp tonight, smells wonderful, clean, fresh, chill… It's a good night, great night, a good night for killing, a great night for… kickball!!! Yeah I see you there pitcher, don't think its gotten past me that you are adding a little bounce to that roll. It's ok though, I still plan on knocking it out of the park. Yeah that’s right, I ate a double bean chili burrito before the game!! Lookout, it's giving me so much power, especially since I washed it down with a redbull and a 5 hour energy mix cocktail. I feel so dang powerful right now, that ball will be lucky if it doesn't explode when I let into it with this power. I've been massaging my kicking leg too. For the past 3 weeks, it's been nothing but a mixture of baby oil, Tabasco, gasoline, and jet fuel on this horse. Soaking for 2 hours a night. Its just ready to unleash the furry on your pitiful little roll.
Don't think I've missed you 3rd basemen, creeping up as if you think I'm going to bunt it. Come on, seriously, do you think something this wonderful is going to let up? That's like buying a Ferrari and living in Alaska, pointless. If you know what's good for you, you'll move back and cover your face. Better yet you better get behind that building 5 miles away cuz that's the only place you'll be safe, maybe. If this thing even comes remotely close to you I feel sorry for you. The impact would be to much for anyone to handle. God himself would need to duck out of the way of this rocket.
As for the rest of you "players" (and I use that term loosely here) I hope you have all your affairs in order, the will signed and you've kissed you husband/wife/kids or dog goodbye, cuz your not coming home tonight. Not after I get up. I almost feel sorry for you, you didn't sign up for this. You thought you'd sign up for a fun night of hanging out with friends having some drinks. Little did you know you signed your own death warrant. Your only hope here is to forfeit now and MAYBE I'll let you leave, with a few of your body parts intact.
I'm not even going to run around the bases, won't have to. Besides the fact the ball won't even be recognizable once I hit it, everyone will be to afraid to come up in fear their future children will fell the wrath of this hit. I'm going to destroy this, we won't lose, we can't lose, I refuse!!!

I then started wondering if Mike was drinking at work now. Not sure. . .

I am alive. . .

I think that's really the most important thing at the moment. . . :)

Weekend Update. . . with your host. . . Me

My mother always said "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

And really my mother is like this. I had a crazy neighbor lady and a pretty psycho roommate. H (and every other person who has met them) can attest to this. And what my mom said about my roommate "She has a lot of issues. And really, don't feel like you have to invite her back to visit with you again." And what my mom said about my neighbor "Woah she has some issues. She's odd." That's about as mean as my mom gets. My dad. . .not so much. But my mom, sweet as can be.

Anyway, I wish I would have listened to her. But alas one of the few times I do say something mean about someone, I text it to them.

I couldn't eat all day Saturday and half of Sunday. I just had this knot in my stomach all day. I'm not sure if Dean even believed my lie. And my friend/neighbor Mike said that I'd be pretty lucky if he talked to me again. Thanks Mike. I was just eaten up all day with it. And felt horrible. And my cousin, MJ, said "well think of it this way, in five years, when he talks to you again, you can totally laugh about it. At his wedding." These people were not helping. And it's not like I'm model material. Or even hand model material. But needless to say, I shouldn't be judgemental and I felt horrible. Plus I'm known for over-thinking things, so this little incident did not help. But Saturday night did.

Saturday night just started off random with MJ, Emily, Mike, and I deciding to go out to dinner and then grab drinks somewhere. Then after Mexican and beers, we met our friends Sarah and Lynn at a very random bar that had some board games. The game was called "What the F@ck?" We had fun with this. And it's dictionary that was included. We also had fun people watching although I did not partake in the making fun of the really drunk people since the incident the night before. But there was this drunk girl that ran into the wall and then looked at Lynn as if she had pushed her. It was priceless.

We then decided to go to a bar that we hadn't been to in like a year. Which we also noticed the clientele had changed. It used to be a good mix of 20-30 somethings who enjoyed 70s/80s/90s and pop music and random townie 40+older people who were friends of the owner. Not now. We walked into Pantera playing loudly and a lot of goth looking people. And then random 40+older people. We had to ask them to turn the heavy metal down because we noticed we were yelling across the table. We became those people.

Then the craziness started. Mike had some coworkers that came in. And since Mike was the only guy with 6 ladies they stayed with us. And one guy hit on all 6. Then every time the girls went out to smoke and I went with, some guy kept high-fiving me. I nicknamed him "high-five guy." Later he asked for my name. "Samantha" I said. Then this other good looking guy came up DRUNK and started putting his hand on my arse while I was sitting there. "I'm Brandon. " "Samantha" I said again. Then owner guy came up and bought us shots. Then creepy guy bought us shots. "Samantha" I said again. Three times I used my bar name that night.

The best story of the night though goes to Mike's co-worker Joel. Who we nicknamed "Felcher."
Here's the definition of Felch. Thank you game from previous bar! :) Anyway, Joel had hit on all of us. Well for some reason, he felt compelled to really hit on me. So as I'm watching the Cubs game he decides to start rubbing my back. And I turn and say "Trying to watch the game, thanks." He then starts to massage my back. Which well, the Cubs were losing and subsequently lost and I was tense from the day before, so I let him. We then lost Joel for awhile but don't worry people, he came back. Then Sarah, Lynn, and Emily left to go home because they were all really drunk from the shots. And since I was driving MJ and Mike, I had to stay sober so I only did the shots and maybe had 2 beers over the course of the night.

As I'm sitting there with my elbows on the table, Joel is sitting next to me and starts to kiss my arm right above my elbow. Then he decides to make-out and LICK my elbow. I cannot make this up. He was licking and making out with my elbow/arm. I give Mike this weird look and MJ and I go to the bathroom. Where I tell her what just transpired. To which she doesn't believe me. And I show her the hair on my arm that has been licked. To which she says "HE LICKED your arm!!!!" Really?? I hadn't noticed.

It was priceless. Words cannot describe this. Or why on earth he thought this would turn me on. So we leave and I tell Mike thanks for introducing us to your friend who then licked my elbow. And Mike starts saying "Well he's not really my friend. So if by friend you mean a coworker who I barely talk to at work and who only probably talked to me because I was with 6 laaad. . . wait did you just say he LICKED your elbow???" We then laugh hysterically. Mike then informs me that I probably could have taken Joel home that night and had some really good stories. I'll pass. . .thanks though! Maybe he would have dog-licked** my face too. That would have been awesome.

So for all you men out there. . . a good way to a ladies heart?? Lick her elbow. It's definitely a turn on. . . or maybe not.

What made my weekend somewhat better was the text I received at 1:30pm on Sunday:

I'm drunk at Buffalo Wild Wings right now and would you come pick me up later? And we can watch Entourage??

From Dean.

Whew.

I texted back that I would do that just let me know what time and it's only 1:30pm how is he drunk? I didn't hear from him until 8pm when he called me. He had driven home and passed out. But he wanted to come over and still watch Entourage if I would have him. And of course I said yes. He didn't bring up the text. Maybe he believed me, maybe not. I still feel really bad but I will NEVER bring it up. Unless maybe someday, like 3 days before his wedding day to her. Just to clear my conscience. :)

**I had a boyfriend do that to me one night at the bar on a dare from our guy friends. I was standing up at the bar waiting for our drinks, and he came up, grabbed my face, licked it very noticeably, and walked away leaving me standing there with the most stunned look on my face. He did it for $40 so I couldn't be that mad. I would have done it for $40 too!

Things you shouldn't do. . .

Reminder to all you readers out there:



Never text anything to anyone that could be mean about someone and then accidentally send it to the person you are talking about.



So. . . as in the previous post, Relationship 101, I mentioned that someone's girlfriend wasn't cute. She was in fact ugly. This would be the new girl that Dean is seeing.

Last night at happy hour, at the start of my first drink, I told my cousin that I needed to show her a picture of something. And she asked "of what??" and I said "well I don't want to tell you in front of all these people. I'll just text it to you." And text I did. To Dean. About his girlfriend.

Yeah. He called pretty upset last night and I had to lie and say that I wasn't talking about him. Which everyone felt that I needed to do was lie. It was a bad lie. Yes. But a lie that had to be done. I don't think we have to worry about us being friends anymore. I'm pretty sure we aren't friends. However, if I was dating someone that was ugly, and someone told me, I'd still be friends with them just. . . it would be awkward.

Friday weird things. . .

I'll probably be adding more to this during the day since it is only 9am. . . but I came across this article and had to share.

I also for some reason became very excited that this was even possible. And weirded out that I drink this when I am hungover. Which would then explain why it might be a cure all for entirely different reasons.

But then good ole Snopes had to prove it wrong. . . for the most part.

I was just thinking that I found a cure for teenage pregnancy and was going to spread the word on this cheap, affective birth control. But. . . so, so, so wrong.

Also I had a flashback from a really, really horrible story my grandpa told me involving a relative of mine (and PJ's and H's) and a coke bottle. Thanks Gramps. . . still mentally warped from it!!!

Relationship 101

Now in life relationships are confusing. Especially the ones I tend to get myself into. Or "weird and awkward friendships" if you will.

However, just because you are curious as to what the new girl in your friend's life looks like and are concerned as to what she looks like, DOES NOT mean (H-talking to you) that you are still in love with that person and want them back.

The reason you care is because you want one of a few scenarios to occur, since he doesn't want to be with you:
1) You want him to be with someone prettier than you but someone that is bitchy so his life is miserable. (Check that one! haha!)
2) You want him with someone that is equally as attractive as you are but is definitely more bitchy than you.
3) You want him to be with someone that is either prettier or just as pretty but who is also slutty and makes out with random people at the bar.

You DO NOT want them to be with someone who is nice and less attractive than you are.

Because if this is the case, people usually go for looks and then personality. . . so why on earth does he not want to be with you? What's wrong with you if you are definitely prettier than the person he is with? Because well frankly you are known for your awesome personality.

Your personality is great. It's your thing. You are a ray of light in an otherwise dark room. (This is what Wyatt always tells me. He says "I need my light to come and visit!") You light up the room whenever you walk in. You can tell your Grandpa and Dad they are being absolutely crabby people but they never get mad at you. My aunt says this is a gift because I am the only person she has ever known who can do this. But I digress. . .

Now I am just wondering. . . what was wrong with me??

Oh no, not again. . .

I think it's time to just quit reading things. I mean ALL things. They depress me.

And now maybe this will depress you. . .

The number 1 and 2 things on there. . . are exactly what I like to eat when I am hungover. Nothing says, "I love you" to a hangover more than a Burger King sausage, egg, and cheese croissanwich and hash browns in the morning.

Now since the weight loss I cannot tell you the last time I even ate that. This might explain the weight gain. . . hmmmm. . .

Now what I have when I am hungover: yogurt and a can of Coca-Cola and maybe an iced vanilla coffee from McDonalds. Or I'll make myself a scrambled egg with cheese, onions, and bacon and some homemade hashbrowns. But if I'm in a hurry, just the yogurt and Coke. It's got to be Coke. And I have no idea why.

Hello, My Name is Samantha. . .

Well. . . my bar name is anyway.

The only times I actually use it are when a complete weirdo/old weird guy/creepy guy comes up to me and asks my name or when a completely and utterly drunk guy comes up and asks. Saturday night the latter happened.

Now the reason I use the fake name for the completely drunk guy is because one of two things could happen:

1) He somehow will remember my name and yell it at me across the bar/street/parking lot, or

2) If around microphone equipment, he will somehow remember my name and say it on the microphone and make me come up and karaoke and then keep saying it until I actually come up. (Sorry, repressed memory. . .)


So on Saturday night at Oktoberfest this super drunk guy comes up to my group of friends and says "Hey come up and dance with us!" Then starts talking to us and asks the ladies in the group their names. Well I'm the last one, and I say "Samantha" at which point, my friend Laura spits out her beer and rolls over laughing uncontrollably. She apparently had never heard me say this before. The guy, who was an attractive looking guy mind you but extremely drunk, looks at her and says, "I know. . . I'm druuunnnk. . . but I just don't want this awesome polka music to go to waste!" He continued to get us to try and dance but to no avail. I wasn't drunk enough yet, and there were 2 people dancing and one guy I was really surprised could even stand. He was doing more of a walking-kick dance. I think to obtain balance. However, after giving the fake name Chops decided that he would call me Samantha the entire rest of the night. And we figured Laura's bar name should be Tess. Well as we were walking around drunk guy actually apologized for trying to get us to dance. His friends were in the band and apparently they had recruited him and some others to get people to dance. It thought that was nice on his part. Now I'm kind of wishing I wouldn't have given him the fake name! ;)

As we are leaving Oktoberfest just Laura and I, this group of 4 guys and 1 girl comes up and 2nd drunk dancing guy comes and puts his arm around me. Again, I think for support. He asks our names and of course I say "Samantha" and Laura says "Tess." He then also asks if one of us would like to make out with him later. To which I say, "Oh darn, I would, but I don't even know your name." So then I ask his name and he says "Peter." I ask him if I can call him Pete because I really like that better and Peter just sounds dirty. He says no. And I say "Didn't you watch the show Pete and Pete?" And he said "Yes but I don't have a dancing tattoo, so I can't just call myself that." He is now approximately a block behind his friends to which the girl in the group yells back "Ted, Hurry up!!" Drunk guy gave me his bar name! haha! What are the odds?!? And I'm guessing he used Peter because he indeed was wanting to be dirty. So I started giving him crap about giving me a fake name. And he tries telling me that his real name is Peter, blah, blah, blah. Well we leave him and go to the bars.

I then proceed to get drunk. I'm not sure how this happened. I was normal, normal, then drunk. Out of nowhere. Well Wine Rep was bartending and wanted me to come see him, which I did want to do but when I texted him and asked if I came there if he would take me home since I didn't have a vehicle, he never texted back. Now if he's wanting to get out of the "Friend" zone he's needing to do these things. So after the third bar we went to, I'm standing at the bar and who should walk by?? Peter/Ted. So I yell "Hey Ted!" and of course he turns to look and I say "Ted, Ted, Ted. . .it's not nice to give people fake names" and then walk away shaking my head.

Then as I was also standing at the bar, this really drunk guy doing this swaying stance asks to buy me a beer and if I could tell him what he was drinking. To which his friend informs me it's his bachelor party. So I smell his drink and he was drinking Red Bull and Vodka. He thanked me and then proceeded to put his hand on my arse. And as I moved his hand off of me, he apologized, and then I told him he needs to be drinking water. His friend agreed but made him finish the drink first. Apparently the guy was a founding member of the band Slipknot. Yeah, can't remember his name. And the other guy was some famous drummer. No idea whatsoever what their names were. But the guy on the other side of me knew who they were.

So as I proceed to get drunker, I texted Dean to see if he was out and about and would come and pick me* up. And you know what?? He was almost asleep and in bed. But he came the 20 minutes to get me, drove me the 20-25 minutes home, and then drove to his house the 20 minutes. Now that's a friend. And since I was drunk I think I talked non-stop from the very moment of getting into his vehicle. I now probably owe him. But I think since he broke my heart, he owes me these kind of things, right??


*I don't mind taking cabs. . . but as a girl, I really don't like taking them late at night to my house. I have in Chicago numerous times, but it's a little different. This town is a lot smaller and easier to remember where you dropped someone off at 2am.

Do you know what's sexy??

Me blowing my nose this week.

Or sneezing 100+ times on Monday.

Or on Tuesday, losing my voice at 8:30am in the middle of a phone call.

Or just sounding all raspy and nasally when I talk.

Or me blowing my nose. Wait already said that. That HAS to be the sexiest.

Dearest Allergies--I still hate you.

Seriously. . . I can't make this stuff up. . .

I think even PETA has gone too far. See this.

I understand the cruelty of animals. But God made dairy cows for the sole purpose of producing milk. They were not made in a lab somewhere that way. I realize that perhaps with the addition of all the machines they use now to milk the cows. . . maybe not the best. . . but still.

PETA you have gone to far. And obviously haven't tasted breast milk. Either have I, but did dare my brother-in-law to. And not good according to him.

Why is it okay to make a woman a human milk producing machine and not an animal?? Does this make sense? PETA you are basically saying that an animal's rights are more important than a woman's rights. Because not sure if you realize this, men can't produce milk naturally. Or is PETA saying just use baby formula as a substitute for milk. In that case, go for it! However, I have accidentally tasted baby formula and it was really, really, really gross.

Off of my chest. . . and onto yours. . .

Things that I need to say:

WAMP--where'd this go?? It's been a while and I miss it. This guy didn't though.

Clay Aiken--Really?? I think everyone had their own suspicions. And really who cares?? It's your life, live it the way you want to.

Lindsey Lohan--Again? Love Line is where you admit it? And really who cares?? You're happy. And your Dad is insane.

HIMYM (How I Met Your Mother to the non 'in the know' crowd)--I love you. Each and every one of you. And Barney. I really love you. Did Robin lose a lot of weight or is it just me??

I just ate homemade Mac&Cheese for lunch that my neighbor made. It was delicious. And totally not in the diet that I need to be on.

I think I am just going to be destined to forever have weird guy relationships.

Dean on Tuesday night Volleyball to our team said "Sometimes I think you wish I was gay." Just because I always have him do little dances. Which by the way, he does on his own without my help. He also makes up little raps/jingles sometimes. Not my fault on this one people.

Wine Rep told me that I put him in the Friend Zone. I'm sorry, your actions put you in the friend zone. Not me.

Whew. .. much better. Thanks!

Oh and my dad is talking to me. He just forgot to call me and tell me he got back home okay. Which if it was me, he would have called me 8 times in an hour.

Why I Am My Dad's Favorite. . .

Now I wasn't always my Dad's favorite. Any relative and close family friend could tell you that. My sister was always number one even though my parents always swore they had no favorites. But it was obvious.

Anyway, this weekend my Dad came to see my Gramps and on Friday told me that he was going to spend Saturday night with me. It mainly was because he was still really jealous that my Mom came in May and spent the ENTIRE weekend with me for Mother's Day. And she, of course, always brings up how she and I had such a wonderful time that weekend, how I pampered her, and bought her a really cute purse.

So on Saturday, Dad and I went to go buy some beer for him for the thing he had on Sunday. He wanted to buy the Miller product Land Shark. And I said "Dad, that's not brewed by Miller. It's Anheiser-Busch." And he said "No it's not. It's Miller." And I said "Dad-I was at Katie's and they had a coaster on their bar, and I said to Katie that I was surprised and didn't know it was brewed by Anheiser." You see, my friend Katie's husband is a brewmeister for Anheiser-Busch. He was adamant about it so I called Katie to clarify. Then later, Katie called back to tell me, that yes I was right. On the label it says Margaritaville Breweries but it's actually Anheiser. They just package it that way because it's a Jimmy Buffet thing. Of course, my Dad cannot tell me that I'm right and says I'm still wrong.

Later on in the night we were talking about something and he says, "So you think you're right about everything, huh??" and I said, "Well obviously I am. Look at earlier today with Land Shark."

And yes, he still hasn't talked to me. :)

Dear Allergies,

I HATE you.

Sincerely,

Me

I just realized something. . .

I miss Dawson's Creek. And you know how I came to this conclusion? It wasn't because the former Love of My Life (LML) and I used to watch it on Friday nights after we came home from the bars. And because the only reason I couldn't watch it on Wednesdays was because LML wouldn't watch it at his place because his friends made fun of him. Even after we broke up, this was our ritual. An awkward ritual, considering I would still lay on his lap on the couch and he'd still run his fingers through my hair while we watched the show. But nonetheless and I digress.

I miss it because I watched Fringe last night. And I realized I'm still in love with Joshua Jackson. I loved Pacey. I had a crush on Charlie in Mighty Ducks I, II, and III. I want to be from Canada just so I can say "Hey Joshua I'm Canadian too, so maybe we should date and maybe get married." I also have secretly watched every movie (good or bad) he's been in. I haven't watched his newest one though. The horror movie one. I'll watch it soon though. I'll make Dean watch it with me. I still haven't paid him back for making me watch Belly. It was a horrible movie and had bad acting, but it had a great soundtrack!

But Fringe is awesome if you haven't watched it. I love JJ Abrams. Well I loved him for Alias--I couldn't get into Lost. I liked the X-Files every now and then. (Okay so I watched it for David Duchovny* who now has a sex addiction.) But anyway, it's awesome and you should watch it.

Also Congrats to D$ and her engagement! YEAH! And you better call me with details. :)

*When I just spell checked this, an alternative to Duchovny was Douching. I just thought that was HILARIOUS considering what's been going on with him!!!!

Adventures in Travelling.. .

Things you should avoid doing: Running through the airport in your new shoes.

Why would someone do that?? Oh because you had to sit on the runway with the plane off for 40 minutes BEFORE you could taxi to your gate and then had to literally sprint with all your luggage from B1 to B42. And barely made the flight. AWESOME. They were waiting for you though because they knew you and 5 other people had to make that connection. Now I have to wear big band aids on the back of my heel for the rest of the week. They are adorable shoes though. Even with the blood stain slightly on the back.

I'm in Miami this week for work. And it's HOT. And Humid. It gets pretty humid here in the summers, but nothing compares to this humidity. That is why I am never moving to Miami. I was sweating just walking the 4 blocks to the train. And my hair is now all wavy and poofy. It was sleek and straight before I left. Glad I took the time to do my hair this morning.

Last night I ventured out alone to eat at the Brewery next to my hotel. I know. I NEVER go out to eat by myself, but I was basically forced to since I was all alone. My goal was to just sit at the bar and eat and maybe some cute guy would come up and talk to me. Well when getting to the bar, there are only old men. And old men for some reason love me and they usually turn out to be creepy, dirty old men, so I am freaking out on where to sit. Then I see this girl sitting by herself and since there was no place to sit without sitting next to someone, I sit next to her. She happens to be from St. Paul, MN, and is there for work as well. What are the odds?!?

And yes, there was a creepy guy that kept looking at me that was sitting a chair away from me. I was lucky to have a normal person! Too bad the creepy guy couldn't have bought my meal! :)

I am still in the process of writing the post from the roadtrip. . . it will get done. . . sometime. . .

I knew it!!!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26205250/

Sorry no time for update yet, but I came across this article! HILARIOUS! I'm glad it's true and almost hate to admit that perhaps I've been victim to it. . . :)

14+ hours later. . .

And Brophy and I are still friends. . .

I'll write about our adventures once I get a chance! :)

I'm confused. . .

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26551009/

Basically (in case you don't want to read the article) it's saying how Ashton Kutcher's ex-girlfriend was murdered and they think they have the guy in custody that supposedly killed her.

Now the thing that has me thinking is the whole ex-girlfriend. See, I guess I'm perplexed at what makes a girlfriend. It says that this woman was killed in her apartment. And the night she was killed, Ashton was supposed to pick her up for an awards thing. He went to the door, she didn't answer, and he then walked around back and saw what he thought were wine stains on the floor and left. He was not the one that discovered her dead though. It was another friend of hers that did.

Now, I would hope if they were actually dating that my boyfriend knowing that we had a date especially for something say an awards show, would take more time in trying to locate me. I mean, if we had plans, I would hope that he would be the one to find me dead. He should know me well enough to know I'm not going to flake on something important to him. Now as a friend, it would make total sense in say thinking that maybe I forgot and then didn't call and let you know or something. And you would just go around the back and be like "Oh well!" That's a little bit more forgivable. However if you're my friend and you're supposed to go to something important with me and skip out. . . I would be pissed!! Perhaps I am the type though that if my friend said they are going to go to something with me and I go to pick them up and they aren't there, I would be calling them or calling a roommate or another common friend and be like WTF?? Because I wouldn't be taking just any friend to an awards show. I'd be taking either a boyfriend or a good guy friend that I know would be a blast. I just find it all around weird. But perhaps this is before everyone and their grandma had a cell phone so Ashton had no way of getting a hold of her. It was in 2000. I guess I'm quasi disappointed in the lack of effort Ashton had in finding the girl. Because if it were me, I'd be at the girlfriend/friend's house after the awards show and be like "Thanks for ditching me!" I also talk a big game, but I am completely a non-confrontational person and probably wouldn't do that, but I might tape a post-it note to his/her door.

I don't know if they are just trying to generate some media coverage for the killer by saying Ashton Kutcher's ex-girlfriend. Who apparently also killed several other women. I think he should be locked up for life. However, I also feel that if they are putting this in the media like they are, that it will be tough to find a jury that won't be partial. Which then irritates me because his victims might not get the justice they deserve if he was in fact the killer.

That is my Friday rant. . . Have a good weekend!!!!

Were you DYING in anticipation???

Things have been hectic here in A-Land.

I have work and my gramps had surgery on Tuesday. He's fine which is good. But I went and saw him in the afternoons and also Wednesday morning and this morning. He's being discharged this afternoon (well that's what they told me this morning) so that's good!

This weekend I'll be in IL visiting the family briefly and then am going to the Cardinals game! WAHOO! YEAH Busch Stadium! And really the only reason I am going to the game is because Brophy asked me to because it's Albert Pujols Bobblehead day. This is the only reason he wanted to go. I wanted to go because I hadn't been to the new Busch Stadium. His girlfriend was giving me a hard time about stealing him away this weekend, but we worked out a deal that she would pick up guys for me this weekend, and I would hang out with her boyfriend. haha!! And technically I didn't steal him away. We made these plans before he had even met her, let alone started dating her. And I jokingly told her as such. Have I mentioned how awesome his girlfriend is?!? Technically I've only met the girls Brophy has gone on like one date with, but I think this one is definitely a keeper!

Tonight is my first night of Kickball. And in case you were wondering, yes I am 12. :) And our team name is The 5th Grade Bullies. I thought it was appropriate. We're still trying to decide on shirts. I was thinking of the picture of the kid who played the one O'Doyle kid in Billy Madison. Remember "O'Doyle Rules!"

Oooh you might possibly be wondering how my Tuesday night went. It went well. Wine Rep actually showed up. We lost 2 games but won 1. :( We were in the SUN though for the 2 we lost. I got hit in the face (not hard) with the ball because I lost it in the sun. Nice. Wine Rep left right after the game, and when I asked why, he said it was because he needed to eat before his other volleyball game at 8:30. Not sure if I believe that considering the place we play at has awesome food and a full menu of more than just "bar" food. I'm thinking it might have a little more to do with Dean being there, but whatever. Not worth wasting my time thinking about his weirdness. Also, he hasn't called me all week. Oh well!

Anyway. . . so later Dean and I went and grabbed some food at another favorite bar place of ours. And while we're talking he says "so. . . this is going to sound weird, but Wine Rep is really good looking." And then high fives me and says "Good Job!" I cannot make this up people. The awkwardness that I felt at this moment is beyond words. Even my friend Sarah who feels Wine Rep is beyond HOT didn't even high five me after she met him. Dean then went on to say that I know he's not into guys and I said "well I've had my suspicions at times." And then he proceeded to tell me about his male whoreness over the weekend. We split soup and when he asked why I got two spoons I said, "I don't know where your mouth has been and really don't want to take any chances." Yes, I'm nice like that and I went there. I did try to ear muff him out but he wouldn't have any of it. Lovely. I'm glad that we're back to being friends and all, but seriously!! TMI. T. M. I.

I'll let you know how my weekend is. . . I'm sure it will be great! We're staying with one of my good college friends in St Louis--whose husband just so happens to be the brew meister for this little company called Anheiser Busch. Not sure if you've heard of them. I'll let you know how it is! :)

Did you chuckle too???

I don't usually talk politics in my blog. Maybe because for the most part, I don't like to talk politics because some people take it to the extreme and are super touchy about it. These are the same people you don't talk religion to. I will say that I do lean more towards the liberal side, and I do tend to vote with the Donkey. However, I will admit--I did not vote for John Kerry. Do not judge me. Had another Democratic hopeful won the candidacy, I would have voted for them in a heart beat. But not John Kerry. He got botox before a debate so he looked better on TV. This is wrong in my eyes. And I have an issue with partial birth abortions. My cousin was born at 25 weeks. I do believe it is a woman's right to choose, but I cannot accept partial birth abortions at this time. However, in the long scheme of things, abortion is a small matter in comparison to the larger things happening in this country.

Enough about politics. . . but the reason I even brought it up is because I love Jon Stewart and thought this was very interesting.

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=184086