I need your advice...Please. . .

This has really been kind of nagging on me all day and I really don't know what to do. And I could really use your help and advice in answering this.

I was having a conversation in which someone told me that I have a weird or loose definition of the word "Friend." I was like Huh?? And I was told that when I to go out to supper with a guy alone that constitutes as a date not a friend, especially when they pay. And I, of course, disagree with this. And even if I happen to make out with them, we are still friends.

Then she says that you can't still be friends with someone you once were previously in love with.
Which I disagree with. She then brought up the point that although Dean is a really great person (and someone she just became friends with on Facebook) that I need to quit talking to him as long as he has a girlfriend now.

And it's not a surprise that it's weird that he has a girlfriend and keeps telling me about their problems and asking for advice, but it's weird because looking back I was in love with him for a lot longer than I realized.

She says the main reason for this is because last Monday (the Monday before Thanksgiving) he was on his way home from work and called me to see how I was doing* and asked if he could stop by to give me a hug tomorrow night because he was really tired and just got off his 2nd job and was almost home. I told him that I was headed home tomorrow and not to worry about stopping by because he was almost home. But he turned around and came by at 10:30 to give me a hug. Okay. He ended up giving me two hugs. But still.

It's weird, yes. But he's my friend. We're close. That's what close friends do, right?? Then she said if she was his girlfriend, she probably wouldn't appreciate him doing that for another girl. So last night when he called I never picked up nor returned his call. I feel bad for that. He was just calling to see how my Thanksgiving was. I haven't talked to him in over a week. Granted, I was home for most of last week. And yes we do still talk at least once a week.

But she is right. I don't know what he's told this new girl about me. Or if at one time that I was in love with him. I mean, if I knew my boyfriend was really close friends with a girl that used to be in love with him, I don't know how I'd feel. And really, he's confused enough about whether or not he wants to be dating this girl. Could I be making it worse somehow even though he just thinks of me as a friend?? It's not like he has feelings for me.

There's a lot of stuff going on right now in my life and it would be super tough not to have him to rely on for it. I do realize that for some reason we are super close and I can't help that. But what do I do?!? Do I quit talking to him?

*My friend Josie's cancer doubled in size again in her liver in two months time. They put her on a chemo holiday and it doubled in size. This isn't good obviously. But they didn't think she would live 6 months when they discovered it metastasized in her liver in February. But it had shrunk in half with the chemo and without the hormones. But then rapidly doubled without the 2 months of chemo. Stupid Cancer!! I should post one of her emails on here, so you can see her strength and optimism. Definitely keep her in your thoughts!