Let me Let Go. . .

I've been trying to figure that out lately. Letting go. It's harder than you think. Like letting go of the fact your team has a whiny-ass QB who fakes an MCL injury and the 3rd string QB actually scores more and plays better. I mean seriously.



Or the fact that your basketball team was ranked #8 at the beginning of the season and has now lost the last 4 games because they can't seem to actually remember how to play basketball.


I just need to let it go.


And right now, I'm trying to let go of a friend. It's hard. I know I've said this before and maybe it's because it was hard around my birthday. I thought I had let go, and then I guess I hadn't because he keeps creeping up in my sub-conscience. And on the side of my stupid Facebook. I should just delete him as a friend, but it's hard since we were the best of friends for almost 4 years.


I've listened to a lot of songs that help you let go. Granted, most songs about letting go of someone are love break up songs. I really think the Foo Fighters "The Best of You" is helping. I don't know why. I think it's about love too, but it's not mushy. . . and friendship is about love. Because you do love your friends. I mean, it's not a song you would slow dance to. . . head bang, yes. . . slow dance. . . no.


I think what makes it's hard is that recently a lot of things have been happening. My friend/coworker was just diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma. It's the easiest to cure and has one of the most successful treatable rates even at Stage 4. It's just bringing back a lot of memories that I am trying to suppress. He was there with Josie. Hugs at 10pm at night. Calls in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep. And now he's not. He knows my coworker. But we don't talk now, so he doesn't know this about her. He doesn't know that my sister's pregnant. And he is pretty close to my sister or at least was at one time. He was buds with my nephew. So that's hard.


One of my guy friends is being super supportive and has told me whenever I need him to call. But the truth is, while he and I have gotten super close over the last few months, it's not the same. I don't like people to see me vulnerable since I'm usually always the rock. And it's hard to let someone in when one of the people you have let in just deserts you all of a sudden. Well not all of a sudden. It will be almost a year since we hung out last besides our sports.


Seriously, didn't I say that I wasn't going to be depressing anymore?? I failed. On one of my first posts into the new year! Ooops!


I have been contemplating on what to do when my new nephews comes into the world. I mean, my nephew, is pretty darn adorable.

But what if the new one isn't as adorable?? Take for instance his conversation with my sister last week:

On Sunday he didn't want to go to school on Monday and told my sister he was pretty sure he was sick and couldn't go to school. She made him go. Then they had snow days on Tues, Wed, and Thurs. Friday morning he says "Mom, I don't want to go to school." And she says "Well, you have to" And he says "This is SHIT, Mommy!"

My sister was pretty stunned and tried really hard not to laugh at him. And then just said something like "Don't cuss and you have to."

And when I talked to him last week he tried telling me his birthday was the 26th. And I said "No, it's March 27th." And he told me that he couldn't believe I didn't know when his birthday was and how I supposedly loved him. But if you look at that face, how on earth could you get mad at him??

As my sister says, God made him cute, so I don't kill him. Which is probably true. But every day he hugs my sister goodbye, he also kisses her belly and tells the baby "bye". What a cutie!!

I'm also dog sitting this guy:

Yeah, he's adorable. One more month. And my Dad keeps telling me that he doesn't miss him at all. But who do you think keeps having me put him on speaker phone so he can say "Hi"??? His name is Butch. My Dad felt he needed a big name. And despite being a little dog, does not hardly bark. Once in awhile he'll bark when a car goes by because the base is too loud. Or when someone will come to the door now and then. Other than that. . .No. My Mom misses him like crazy.

I'll miss him when he's gone, but I feel horrible leaving him at home all day and on the weekends when I have plans.

Happy Week everyone!